Imagine...

Do you have children? If so, how much did you imagine about that child before he/she was born? Was your child going to look like you? Talk like you? Dress like you? How tall would your child be? Did you know she would have crooked teeth? Or be certain he would have acne as a teen? Did you know what shoe size he would wear? Could you imagine the hairstyles you would give her?

Imagine a child.  Imagine a child that is non-existent to your world. Imagine Your child.

I can't say that this activity was easy for me even when pregnant with my son. The only thing I could really imagine was that he would be cursed with my crazy hair! Sure, I do love my hair, but as a girl I can "tame" it with binders and irons - I was horrified that Caleb would have to deal with frizz and pouf - but, to my great relief, he has his father's hair...although, he might not be too happy about that when he hits 25... but I digress.  :)

Jon and I started completing our agency homework through a workbook called, "With Eyes Wide Open: Preparation for International Adoption." I thought - well this can't be too bad. We answer a few questions together, turn it in, and we are done with this small portion of our to-do's before we adopt.

And then I opened to the first page. Exercise 1. This isn't going to be as easy as I had thought...

"This exercise may be the hardest of all (in the book). Draw a picture of your future child or use your imagination to picture your future child in your mind."

 

Sure, I've thought about my babies' color of skin. I've thought about their smiles. The texture of their hair. I've thought a lot about how I will hold them - tightly.

 

But had I ever Really thought about their age when they come home? Or will we bring home boys, girls, a boy and a girl? And then my mind really started to race when the exercise asked us to "include the details that will set your child apart from the others." We were encouraged to think about their clothes, what types of shoes they will wear. What their eyes look like when they look at you. How your children hold your hand.

 

And my heart beat loudly.

 

I still have no true idea what to expect when we receive our adoption referral. But to know that this child or children that I love So dearly, will be a part of our family, is a breathtaking thought. I may not know exactly what they will look like, but I Can imagine what it will feel like to feel their hands in mine, to look at their chocolate eyes, to smell their hair, to kiss their cheeks...

 

And on a more humorous tone - I went as far to daydream about having a little girl! For some reason I have this odd feeling God will bless us with a house full of boys!  And even though there are some cute polo's and button down shirts... it only takes a few months before you get tired of the variations of blues versus oranges, and stripes versus solids!!!  So, I daydreamed about cute dresses, hair clips, and striped tights.  :)

So, what did I draw (or try to draw with my limited artistic skills) - a boy about 4 years old and a little girl (in a pink, polka dotted dress!) that is around 2.

Doesn't that sound perfect?  :)

In Christ,

Mara