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Missing milestones


As I sat in church today, I watched a baby boy drinking from his bottle, playing with a little toy, and looking into his mother's eyes... and I thought, can I really do this? Can I really miss so many milestones in my child's life?

How many life milestones are there before age 5?

sleeping through the night...
cooing...
smiling...
sitting on own...
laughing...
eating solids...
standing...
walking...
talking...
running...
singing...
jumping...

Those are the main milestones, but what about all of those small ones? There are too many to count. So many that Jon & I will miss when we bring home a child, versus a baby.

I do not doubt that I can love the children that we bring into our home, as I know that I already do love them, even though I do not even know who they are. But I do wonder what my response will be to the knowledge that I was not able to share in their milestones. I will not have pictures. I will not have "proof". I won't have stories to tell. I will have missed so many milestones, and this reality can be hard to swallow.

Why have we chosen to not adopt a baby? How fun it would be to have a little one in the house again, witness the milestones, attach to the child - but little ones aren't the ones looking for a home. So many people are fighting to bring home a baby, so they can witness these milestones, and help shape the child from beginning to end. We were blessed with our own biological child, and (for better or worse!) we have helped be his role models and share with him what he knows today. We have seen each and every  milestone, and have a lot of "proof" to share with others that he did indeed reach these milestones. It was fun to watch him grow, yes, but we got our "baby" time - it is someone else's turn. I can't imagine my little boy's life without us there. If he was to loose us, I would want him in a home with parents, not in an institution. There are so many small children waiting for homes just because they are no longer a "baby". Even though many of their milestones have passed, they have so many more to share.

What milestones do children have between age 5-18?

Learning numbers & letters...
Tying a shoe...
Making a friend...
Losing a tooth...
Riding a bus...
Playing an instrument...
Competing in a game...
Having a crush...
Driving a car...



These are just as exciting of milestones as the first. Will I miss the small things of early childhood that I don't get to witness? yes. Yes I will. I won't deny that. But, through writing this, I am remembering the beauty of EVERY stage of life, no matter how young or old. There is always a new milestone to be witnessed or to achieve. And soon we will be parents that get to witness these milestones with more than one child - what a blessing that will be! 

Yesterday we decided to get "proof" that Caleb has turned 5... he is looking older and older each day... Hallelujah for the blessings and milestones that he brings to our family each and every day!












In Christ ~
Mara
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